Monday, December 2, 2013

I'M ENGAGED!! : our proposal story // northeast, tx wedding, portrait, and lifestyle photographer

It is love from the first 
Time I pressed my hand into yours 
Thinking, 'Oh, is it love?'
Oh, say, wouldn't you like to be
Older and married with me?
Oh, say, wouldn't it be nice to
Know right now that we'll be
Someday holding hands in the end.
|  hellogoodbye - oh, it is love  |
For all those that are following along with the story of how "Trevor + I" came to be, I am planning on finishing that story. Don't worry! ;) But I thought you might all like to hear this story right away!

I've had my fair share of dreams and expectations of what a serious relationship with someone would look like before I was in one. It would take time to know if they were "The One" I would spend the rest of my life with. I wanted to be surprised once the time came for the guy to ask me "The Big Question." So surprised, I didn't even want to know that he was planning to ask to marry me or that he was even thinking about marriage! (Dreams...remember I said dreams.)

And then the serious relationship thing happened to me. 
Oh boy. My dreams were crushed and forgotten in the most wonderful of ways. Things happened so much differently than I had foolishly expected. Different as in both infinitely more challenging and yet infinitely better. One of the most shocking parts was how quickly I knew I wanted to marry Trevor. How positively sure I was. It wasn't an "Oh, that would be nice. I like him a lot" feeling. It was a "Dear Lord, please let me marry him. I couldn't imagine loving anyone else this much." I fell hard and I fell fast. I wanted to be this man's wife more than anything I had ever wanted before. 
Thankfully he's a very honest person and he doesn't really hold on to what he's thinking. So when he was open about feeling the same way I knew I was in for a crazy ride. After all, I was only 17 at the time! My parents were (are) very protective and wanted this whole process to go slow and honor God. That was all fine and good with us but when you're barely two months in and you are both very sure you want to get married in the end...the waiting process became, once again, different than I expected. 

But the days with him were bright, and fun, and new, even if they were mingled with hard, trying, confusing days. Our souls were both tested to, what seemed like, the breaking point many times. And yet, we waited. We knew this is what we wanted and it didn't matter. Some people go many more months than we had...years even! By the grace of God we would endure. And, Lord willing, we would wake up one morning and find ourselves husband and wife.
Time did move on (slow though it was.) Month after month passed. Summer was ending. Engagement seemed less like a far in the future plan and more like a, "Maybe in the fall," type plan. Though it had been tossed around several times in conversation, Trevor officially asked my dad (which I knew) and was given permission to get a ring (which I knew.)
The thing is, even after all this time and changed dreams and new joys, I was still sure of something.
I wanted to be surprised. And he wanted to surprise me.
Problem is, surprising me was going to be one of the toughest feats he's ever accomplished. I was the un-surprisable girlfriend. I love being surprised but I hate being in the dark about stuff! Things weren't falling into place to his advantage either. 
One of the first times I ever heard Rachel talk about "Trevor Ruby" I remember saying, "Awww! His last name is Ruby? It may be slightly cheesy but I think it'd be adorable if he ever gets married for him to give the girl a ruby engagement ring! That'd be soooo cute and awesome!" Fast forward to a month or two after that same Trevor Ruby and I were in a relationship and during a phone conversation he said, "Look, I'm not trying to rush things cause I have no idea if we'll get married....but just to have advice from a girl...if I ever get married, would it be silly to give her a ruby engagement ring?" I thought to myself, "Yep. We're meant to be. Already had that thought like ten months ago, dude."
(Disclaimer: That's not what was the deciding factor for me.) ;)
So when it came to looking for a ring, I already knew it would be a ruby. The first place he went to was his mom. Her last name is ruby too so surely she had one. ;) Turns out she had two of them! She said one was dark and one was light. I wanted the dark one. No doubt about it. I have a soft spot for deep dark red rubies. They seem more real than fuchsia or pinkish ones. If I was going to wear a ruby on my finger for the rest of my life, I wanted ever-so-much for it be that kind. The way Trevor said she talked about it, it didn't sound like it would be a very pretty ring but the stone was big and dark and he could do whatever he wanted with it. So in the mail from Georgia to Texas it went!
The day he got it in the mail we were both very excited. We were one step closer to our dream come true! 
Because, from what we thought, the ring was not going to be anything spectacular he decided I could see it. It wasn't ruining the surprise for me because all that would be used from this ring would be the stone.
Ha. That was a funny joke. 
As he pulled off the lid of the box and we leaned in to look we both quickly jerked back up and looked at each other. Almost in unison we whispered, "Oh no. It's beautiful."
Soooo, we loved it. I mean loved it. It was perrrrfect. I loved the setting, I loved the color...everything! Gosh, I was ready for him to stick it on my finger right then and there and call it a done deal! 
But the more we talked about it the more ideas I had for changing it up so that it would be a unique, "never before and never again" type of ring. However, we kept running into the same thing. I loved the top of it. Its magnificent. There were too many possible routes we had brewing in our minds. Spoiled surprise or not...I was going to have to go with him to the Jewler to design it. 

I walked in nervously as the bell that rings when someone opens the door jangled above me. I gulped. "How does someone act when they come to look at rings? Or more specifically...come ask a jeweler to remake one? Was it going to be wildly expensive? Was it gonna end up ugly? Does this mean I'll really be getting engaged soon?! Snap out of it, Trevor's talking to someone at the front desk!" 
There he was trying to discuss with the girl behind the shiny, brightly lit, glass counter full of sparkles what our game plan was. It was a silver ring but I wanted gold because I have my great-grandmother's gold wedding band that I plan on using for my wedding band. Could we overlay the silver with gold? The look she gave us clearly indicated a big no. And I wanted the band thinner...it was a bit too thick. Three rows of five little diamonds on each side of the shank and the way the top was set almost gave it the appearance of a class ring. But I loved the setting. No protruding stone. No prongs. Not quite an oval and not quite a circle. YES PLEASE. The explanation became so jumbled and full of details that she finally said, "Let me just go get Randy, the owner." 
We waited for a few minutes before a pleasant looking middle aged man came out of a back room, hand outstretched for a handshake and a smile. He was more than happy to hear all of our tangled web of ideas and he clarified and gave input in all the right places. Within 15 minutes we had all complied an imaginary ring sure to be breath-taking. But the price tag....what would it be?? 
We paced back and forth as Randy went back to his office to do some "calculations." 
My dad's mom had given us a few old gold rings that she didn't want anymore so we were able to apply that gold to the whole ordeal (knocking the price down!) We wanted the top to stay the same so the whole ring would not have to be remolded or recast. I wanted the diamonds on the current shank to be used as the detail for the new shank. Sure enough, all our thrifty thinking and loop holes paid off! The price scratched onto the slip of paper Randy brought us showed a number well inside Trevor's budget! Praise God!
Now the ring was ordered. They didn't give us an estimated time they just said they would call him. Maybe I actually could be surprised now. It could be finished at any time and I wouldn't know it. 
Weeks passed. There was no way for me to know the progress of that little beauty so I sorta forgot about it. "Let the surprise come to you....just don't stress." I told myself.
That is until I overheard my mom on the phone with the jewelry shop....asking about the order. It had been almost 6 weeks. She sounded worried. So he didn't have it yet and they weren't finished. "It'll be ready Monday or Tuesday? Ok...great! Thanks so much!" 
Snap. I heard that. Now I know it'll be ready next week....making it that much harder for this whole thing to take me off guard. 
The next week, mine and Trevor's friend, Michael came to visit! He and all the festivities that came with his visit were definitely a distraction and, once again, I nearly forgot about knowing anything! But then Thursday was Thanksgiving. He, Michael, and my dad had to "run to town" the day before...for no apparent reason. Who was I kidding...I knew they had gone and gotten it! They must have! 
Which meant he could do it...now! At Thanksgiving! At my grandparents' house with all my dad's family there! I excitedly painted my nails to match the holiday (orange + gold...ha) and curled my hair with extra care. It was a tiny hope but I clung tightly to it. The whole day passed. Nothing happened. But I was okay! I knew it was just a matter of time! I will probably feel like this lots of days...for a while...until he finally asks! Friday came...and went by. All my mom's family were in town because we were going to have Thanksgiving with them on Saturday. My mom and I went to my Mam-maw's house Friday night to hang out since my twin cousins from Austin had just gotten there and my Aunt Dana, who lives down the street, came too. We had chicken and dumplings and I teased everyone (when they asked me how things were going with Trevor) that I might very soon be wearing an extra piece of jewelry and calling him something else besides my boyfriend. ;) They all laughed. Of course...they didn't know that I knew that he actually had a ring and really was going to propose soon probably. But it was fun to make light of it...instead of being anxious about it like I was tempted to do. ;) 
The next morning when I woke up I walked to my back door and the sun shone brightly through the glass. It was just rising. It was beautiful. I couldn't remember the last time I had seen the sun rise when it wasn't a day that I was rushing to work and not fully enjoying it. I had time to pray and when I opened my Bible I realized the passage I was going to read was Ecclesiastes chapter 3.

"For everything there is a season and a time for every purpose under Heaven. . . He has made everything beautiful in its time." 

Oh. It hit me hard. This life that He had blessed me with. From my salvation to this moment sitting here over my Bible with fluttering thoughts about getting engaged being right on the brink of reality for me...it was beautiful! Achingly so! And set in a particular God appointed time too! All of it! 
"If I could choose a day to be engaged," I thought, "I would choose today!"
Then later, when I was getting ready for the day Mama came into my room and said, "You want me to just tell him to ask you today?" I laughed nervously. My stomach was in knots. That would be amazing!! But how would I be surprised if I knew it was going to be today?? He came over so that he could drive behind my parents on the way there and I could ride with him. As I left the hosue...I felt pretty. I liked my hair, my makeup, my outfit...it was a warm, happy feeling. And he looked cute too!! It was one of those, stop and stare at him a few extra seconds kinds of cute! I held his free hand tight as he drove. And the thought kept cropping up, "If only it could be today." 
His house is in between mine and my Aunt's (where we were having Thanksgiving) and right before we passed it he said, "You wanna see your Christmas present?" His smirk and raised eyebrow clearly gave away that he was joking but I countered back, "Yeah! Sure!" He slowed down almost to a complete stop right in front of his house. "Really? You really want me to?" My head was spinning....was he joking or not? Was this it? Is this how it was going to be? Does this sick feeling count as surprised?? 
"Naaah. I won't! Come on...let's go. I was just messing with you!" And with that he accelerated and his house was long behind us. "So the ring is at his house." I tucked that away in the back of mind, knowing that if he left in his car at any time during the day and then came back...he probably went and got the ring. Yep. I wanted to be surprised but I wouldn't be. Every time he was out of my sight I would watch his car like a hawk. There would be no sly getaway. No slight of hand. Despite all that was within me wanting to be oblivious, I was very very aware of what was going on. 
The day drug on and it seemed like today really may not be the day after all! He went on long walks numerous times but that wasn't uncommon for him...and his car (and everyone else's) stayed put when he was absent. I got a bit frustrated actually. At one point I realized I was almost scowling at him because he asked if something was wrong. I gave him one glance and he knew exactly what I was thinking.
"Listen, Mare....you are way too snoopy! You're not supposed to know any of this stuff! I'm not ever gonna be able to catch you off guard!" 
So there it was. He wasn't planning on doing it today. He was still thinking of a way to pull off a surprise. And it wouldn't be today. He wasn't leaving. He wasn't going to get the ring. And I wasn't going to get engaged. Or so I thought. ;)  
Around 4:30, my sister Holly, my parents, Trevor, my Uncle, my cousin Mitchell, and I all drove down to Uncle Donald's house which is only a few miles from Aunt Dana's. He had built two big new porches that we hadn't seen and they were awesome! I've talked seriously about getting married somewhere on his 70 acres of good ole' Texas forest/field combo but couldn't solidify how the reception would work. As we stood there under those massive porches, Mama shot me a look. She twirled around and said, "You could dance here. And have food. Basically....a reception." It was so true! As I contemplated that revelation I took the ring I always wear on my right hand off and was fiddling with it. Trevor sat beside me in the porch swing and I handed the ring to him. He loves playing with that ring. He takes it off of me at church, at a restaurant...pretty much any time and place where he's sitting by me. After we had spent a good fifteen or twenty minutes out there we headed back to Aunt Dana's where everyone else was. We walked inside and I was about to go sit down when I felt that strange sensation that is indescribable. I wasn't wearing my ring. I turned to Trevor. "Hey, where'd you put my ring." He held his hands up and it wasn't there. "Don't worry. I bet its in the car." He said. I was going to let him go get it but then I decided to go out there with him. Why not? The light was pretty, the temperature was great, and I wanted to make sure he found it. No reason not to follow him! 
(Yay for following him!!)
As he opened the door on the passenger side I was standing there, not anticipating a thing. It was as if I momentarily forgot getting engaged was even on my radar. He was on his knees fumbling around in the floor board and then, all in one motion, he propped himself up to be on just one knee and reached into his pocket. For a split second I thought he was going to pull out the ring we had been looking for and tease me with a "fake proposal" because he knew how antsy I was. He hadn't gone home so I knew he didn't have the ring. This wasn't what I thought/hoped/wished it was....but then....
I saw red. And shiny. And my heart stopped. I started breathing rapidly and my eyes widened. I must've looked like a terrified 5 year old because in that very moment he did too. For a brief second we were scared, excited children taken aback by what was happening. I felt so little. I blinked hard to try to take it all in....but I could've sworn that I had lived this already....in Kindergarten...with a different boy....and a pipe-cleaner circle. 
Then those words that I've heard a million times in my life but never truly to me came spilling out of his mouth. 

"Will you marry me?" 

And he gently slipped that most beautiful ruby ring ever onto my finger. (My wedding ring finger! Ah!) All the emotions hit me like a train wreck and I fell to my knees, nearly tumbling into him saying "Yes!" as many times as I could. I held his face and started sobbing. Not dab my eyes with a Kleenex cause I'm tearing up. I mean...like this:
 
We stood up and I vaguely realized I was shaking. He held me tightly against his chest as I continued to weep, heart pounding, breaths coming at an ever changing unusual pace and my whole body shook. But between the gasps of breath there was laughter. 
I was happy. So overwhelmingly happy.
And surprised. Very very surprised. Shocked. Taken off guard.
Mission very much accomplished. He was glad to see that as he said, "Woa! I...I surprised you! I really legit surprised you! You're surprised!!" ;)
My abundance of "Yes"s turned to "I'm gonna marry you"s. He smiled and followed each hard-to-understand exclamation I threw at him through the tears with, "I love you." 
And then he took my hand. He sat down in the car and I curled up in his lap like a child. He held me tight and began praying. Crying out to our Lord thanking Him over and over again for His goodness and mercy to us! He prayed for our future together and pleaded that we would bring glory to the Father with our lives together as husband and wife. "We love each other, Father. And you brought us together in your perfect time. Thank you, Father. Thank you. The lines have fallen to us in pleasant places. Thank you." It was by far one of the most glorious things I've ever experienced. I never wanted to leave. It was the most beautiful prayer I had ever heard. As many times as I've thought my heart was going to burst....it truly could have right then and there. 
After about 15 minutes or so we got out of the car and he said, "Well...I guess we should go tell everyone." I suddenly threw my arms around his neck again. "No no! I wanna stay with you!" I was weepy again and the shakes came back. He laughed and took my hand and walked me back up the driveway to the house. 
My attempts to quickly stifle my crying were unsuccessful. I sounded like I was having a heart attack, and an asthma attack, and a panic attack all in one. But I was smiling...so that was a good sign, right? 
Needless to say when I walked in everyone was worried. They all stood up and started asking, "What's wrong with you?! Did you get hurt?! WHAT'S WRONG?!" 
My upheld left hand was shaking so hard they couldn't focus on what I was trying to direct their attention to. My Aunt was the first to see it. "No...NO! Oh oh oh!!" From then on it was a flood of mingled tears, congratulations hugs, and admiring the ring. Then Trevor looked up and saw that the football game that he had been watching was still on. (He's from Georgia....he's a Georgia Bulldogs fan - and his mama is a suuuper big fan) The Dawgs were up against Georgia Tech. Two Georgia teams! College football! Hold everything! He raced into the living room and grabbed the remote to turn it up. "One second, guys! This game is almost over!" The room erupted into laughter as I clung to him...not caring much what he was doing as long as I was there with him. With makeup streaming down my face I clung tight as he watched it go into overtime. 

Then we rushed outside to take pictures. My mom was so nervous and I was still laughing, and shaking, and saying, "Wait! Is this real? IS THIS REAL?!" She snapped away. "I don't know if any one of these are in focus!" She exclaimed. (Most of them aren't but ya know....I still reallyreally love them so much. They capture our story just the way it was!


Then I started yelling, "RACHEL! I HAVE TO TELL RACHEL!!!" And so I texted my best friend. I wanted her to be the first one, outside of who was there, to know. :) <3 And he snapped some pictures to text his parents!! It was all so surreal! Sharing news, I hadn't even grasped myself, with other people! :D


 I kept shaking, and laughing, and crying at different intensity levels as the sun began to set. And then I saw it! One of the loveliest sunsets I've ever seen. My whole day, from sunrise to sunset, had been so much good and pleasant and right. It was perfect. He didn't have a plan....he just waited for the moment to arise. It seemed like everything I did made a surprise more and more impossible and yet...a perfect time did arise. And it was simple, and beautiful, and real, and perfect. Not because of grandeur, not because of a speech (Yeah...sorry....He didn't pull a Mr. Darcy and give me the whole "You have bewitched me body and soul" declaration), but because my Father in Heaven had placed every moment in both of our lives just so to make that magical moment possible. I can't say it enough...Praise God!!

Our hearts are full from all the love, and congratulations we have received since Saturday. To knock a few FAQ's out of the park....we're still in shock...so no decided date just yet. ;) We're thinking Spring to give you a general answer. I haven't chosen too many details yet cause...I'm still waiting to see if this is nothing but a wonderful daydream one of these days ;)  No but really, all the prayers you offer up for us are more appreciated than you will ever know! We haven't finished the battle yet! And the battle won't end on the long awaited wedding day. The dream of marriage will, Lord willing, soon be our everyday life and we know we will need the grace of our Lord showered out upon us more than ever! I'm sure in the weeks to come when planning starts I'll fall off of cloud nine and come back to earth but for now, pardon me....I'm soaring. :)

~Through Christ's Love  

34 comments:

  1. oh my. what a dream come true! rejoicing with you, allix and trevor!

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  2. No word right now. *dreamy sigh...

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  3. My heart is rejoicing with you. I can't stop smiling as I read this!

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  4. This is....perfection.

    no other word than that. ...thanks for sharing. :)

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  5. My heart is all a flurry with excitement for you two, Allix!! Congratulations, my dear!!!

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  6. Oh, Allix! This is such a beautiful, beautiful story. Your love for each other and for The Lord inspires me so much! I will be praying for you two!!

    Lindsey

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  7. Oh Allix, Praise The Lord!! I am so overjoyed for you. Thank you for sharing your story. I've loved following along so so much. Your story is such an encouragement. I've been praying for you and Trevor and will continue to do so. May The Lord continue to richly bless you both. ((Hugs!)) <3

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  8. Oh Allix this is truly AWESOME! I am so, so very happy for you and Trevor!
    Sarah

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  9. Allix!!! I'm so excited for you! THANK YOU for sharing this journey. I can't wait to hear about the next 60 or so years ;) By the way… Trevor's prayer after his proposal had me in tears! Congratulations again, and may God bless the future Ruby Family!!

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  10. This is so precious. Like, I cried.

    I am so excited for you, girl!!!

    Huge hugs!!!!

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  11. Congrats sweet girl! Beautiful story and beautiful ring!! Loved reading the part about you and Trevor praying together right after... so beautiful!

    xoxo A
    http://missalk1994.blogspot.com

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  12. Oh Allix, I have had a Cheshire Cat grin on my face throughout your whole story, interspersed with some giggles and teary eyes. Your joy is contagious and my whole day has been brightened because of it. Congratulations again to you both!

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  13. Praise the Lord!! This is beautiful and I'm sososo happy for you both!! (And by the way, the whole part about him having to finish the game was HILARIOUS.)

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  14. Sitting here crying!! So excited for you!! So thankful that the Lord drew you together!! I have loved reading your story!! Congratulations!!

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  15. This. Is. The. Best. I can't even express how happy I am for y'all. Do you remember when I was taking your pictures? And I asked about your Trevor? The sparkle in your eyes as you talked about him was marvelous. I'll never forget it. :) I pray that the Lord blesses your future life together immensely. Love you, girl <3

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  16. Allix, this is wonderful. I am so happy for you. God works in wonderful ways. :) I'll be praying for the two of you. *hugs* :D

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  17. I am SO happy for you two!! Ah :') xoxoxoxoxo

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  18. AHHHHH. HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY DAY. SO EXCITED FOR YOU, ALLIX! <3 :) You two are absolutely gorgeous and adorable. :D

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  19. I've read this over and over again, I just can't get tired of it or stop smiling...congratulations to both of you, I am happier for you than I can tell!
    Xo

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  20. That is so amazing, Allix!

    I'm actually crying right now, that's such a perfect story. I hope you two are insanely happy and have a wonderful marriage. That was so lovely to read, it seems too perfect. I can't imagine something like that happening to me, so I totally understand how you feel like it's a dream!

    You two are so amazingly cute, I can't even begin to tell you.

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  21. im so happy for you allix!!!!! your love story is an inspiration to us all, how you put God in control and didn't rush it. i pray you have a wonderful marriage (and wedding) CONGRATS!!!! Yall are sooooo cute!!!!

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  22. Congrats! You two are the cutest! All the best with the time of planning! :)

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  23. Love your story of how the LORD put you two together!! I'm so excited for the plans he has for your future with Trevor! Congratulations again!! :)

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  24. Allix!! I am SO excited for you and Trevor. :D Loved reading through your epic proposal story and almost canNOT wait to finish reading the other parts of your story. :) Ahh, so excited for you two and praying that the Lord will bless you both abundantly as you continue to serve Him together!! <3 Congrats, Trevor + Allix!! #cutestpicturesever #bytheway :)

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  25. oh my goodness Allix! Y'all are precious, and your story is so beautiful. I scrolled down one line at a time so I couldn't jump ahead and see the end :) I LOVE hearing that you prayed together right after Trevor proposed...so right and beautiful and special. Thank you for sharing this!!

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  26. They both are looking awesome together. I will definitely pin these pics for sure..!!

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  27. ALLIX!!! ahh you have like the best love story EVER! ;)) I'm so happy for you both!!
    -Allison

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  28. SO MUCH HAPPY! eek. i seriously can't stop smiling. this is the most beautiful story! and it all fits together so well, God is amazing with the little details. congratulations!

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  29. ALLIX!! CONGRATULATIONS! I am so darn excited and happy and thankful for you! And I don't even know you! But I've loved the little snippets I've seen of the both of you over the past year. So much love and happiness. Congratulations to both of you! I can't wait to the rest of your story and hear about your wedding and the rest of your lives... together!

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  30. Allix, Congrats! I love read each segment of your love story, you do very well in your writing + photography. :)

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  31. Oh Allix:) crazy how much God is in control even when we don’t realize it!

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  32. Oh my goodness!! SO it's 12:30 and I just stumbled on your blog via another photographer's blog (I'm 19, Christian gal and I love photography ;)) and just read your whole love story (as much as you have up right now...FINISH IT!!! haha) and your engagement story, for the past hr and a half! It is the SWEETEST STORY ever!!!!!!! I don't even know you and I am so happy for you and Trevor!!! :) Oh, and it's crazy cause Trevor looks SO MUCH like a guy I like...haha a girl can dream, right? ;)

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  33. Oh I can't type because I'm trying to stop sobbing from reading this! Words can not explain how sweet that is! <3

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Hey!! You're commenting!! You are so nice :) Thanks for making my day. :D