Thankful // Personal

The way I had envisioned this post last night at 5:45 is drastically different than how it is actually going to be. 

At that time I typed furiously away on my laptop, racking my brain to think of 99 things I am thankful for as we drove down a windy country road leading to our friends' house where we were to have dinner. 

The day before I had had the inexpressible joy of sitting down with my great-grandfather, Royce Brunson, to talk. Just talk...about anything and everything from his military experiences to his grandmother's famous egg custard. It was one of the funnest conversations I've ever had. For mementos sake I had my iPod sitting on the coffee table recording our words and I had my camera on a tripod capturing video. 

We talked for hours before Mama and I thanked him dearly for giving us his time and memories and got up to leave. He walked us to the door and I turned around to give him a hug. He hugged me tight, kissed me on the corner of my right cheek, and whispered, "Love ya, Shug-er" in my ear as I breathed in his scent deeply and felt the smoothness of his face and the roughness of his goatee. 

Back to last night...

We had a fun-filled dinner with friends and as the plates were taken away from the table, they pulled out a board game. The night was filled with laughter and then all at once my dad's cell phone went off. He had gotten a text. He jumped up, almost stumbling and ran as fast as he could out the front door. My legs felt weak as I got out of my chair and followed after him with Mama behind me. We rushed to his side as he said the words,
 "Something's wrong with Poppy."

 The words hit me like a speeding bullet that drove straight into my heart, tearing all the way through me. Before I could even comprehend anything and stop my head from spinning, he had called and gotten the news.

"He's gone. He had a heart attache around 10:00 and he...died...instantly."

All three of us fell into a heap of emotion on the driveway and hardly knew what to do. We made due with the vague and confusing words that came out of our mouths to explain to our friends why we needed to leave immediately and then drove quickly to the hospital. 

I felt like all the air had been taken from me. Stolen. I couldn't even cry. I felt empty and hollow like the shell of the girl that had been laughing cheerfully just 15 minutes ago...or like a faded memory of the girl that had just hugged this wonderful man the very day before.

I still feel numb in the depths of my heart and can hardly think straight to tell you the truth. But that does not mean I am in "the depths of despair."

You see, I always am aware that God is in control of all things. I also keep in mind that all things work together for good to those that love God and who've been called according to His purpose. {Romans 8:28} But there are certain times that He decides to show us a burning bush, a parted Red Sea, or the writing on the wall just for us to comprehend His Providence, Glory, Grace, Mercy, and Love. 

As I stood in the hall of the hospital I felt like I was drowning in the stark white surroundings and being blinded by the harsh florescent light. My family stood around with visible shock painted on their face. And then it hit me...

I saw him yesterday.

I talked to him yesterday. 

And I captured his happiness, his laughter, his smile, his memories, his mannerisms, his voice the day before the Lord took him.

Now its ours, a split second decision made in time to go visit him and hear things that we had never heard before.

He was a character, he was loving and funny, kind and compassionate, extremely wise, and so very meek and mild.

He was my Gran-Poppy and I needed that time with him. So now it will be easier for me to grieve, to remember, to cherish, and to feel again. My whole family will be able to benefit from those videos and recordings. I was preparing a time capsule and didn't even know it.

But the Lord knew...and He knows...and He will always know.

And He is so good. Immeasurably good.

Today I am Thankful that God is God.

And that God is Good.

~Through Christ's Love ♥

Madeline Rain: 5 months // paris, tx baby portrait photographer

It is always fun to schedule photo-shoots.

The anticipation, excitement, blog-surfing-for-inspiration, excess smiling and or crying out of nervousness {not that I've done this...much ;)} that takes place before The Day arrives always stimulates quite an adrenalin  rush and once its all over you feel so worn out you're ready to sleep for days.

Then there's something called spontaneity.

Definition? In this case it means, I was at my grandparents' house to hang out, they happen to be keeping my adorable 5 month old cousin and there's a pile of leaves in the yard...just her size {did I mention the lighting was lovely and baby Maddy has gorrrgeous brown eyes?}. It's times like these that I believe I would be pretty silly to pass up such a photo opportunity that has so graciously fallen into my lap. :)

This cousin may not strike you as familiar but if you've been anything close to a regular around here for a while then you probably have seen this blog post about her birth. She's grown bunches in the last 5 months. :)

Her precious hot pink boots and the leaves added a beautifully fun fall touch...

or tasty fall touch...it depends on which one of us you ask. ;)

Oh dear me, brown eyes are so pretty. They are deep and rich and dramatic in a way other eye colors simply can't be. However, blue eyes and all other light eye colors in general are usually easier to photograph because they easily capture light which is what you want when you're aspiring to take a stunning portrait. So when you actually do have surprising success at capturing lovely light in dark eyes you, or at least I, get a tad bit giddy and feel like I've hit a grand slam, out of the ballpark, during the World Series. It's a good moment. :D

ANYWAYS! Brown eyes...Maddy's brown eyes in particular...I love them :D

I also love that she is a very happy and calm tempered baby. :) Makes my job waaaay so much easier.

Her brother and Daddy have white blond hair and so I guess I always assumed that she would too...but I personally see some dark peach fuzz on that head of hers. :D

Did I mention that her boots are adorably awesome? Cause they are...I want some in my size...really!

YAY for babies in baskets! I know, I know...major cliche. But hey, usually ridiculously cute things are cliches. :)

Again...such a happy baby. :D

Prolly my favorite...yeah....pretty sure :) :)

Wow. Props? Outfit change? Maybe this was more of a legit photo-shoot than I thought. ;)

She was very fascinated with her tutu :)

Bubbles :)

Yeah, so...I'm sorta, kinda, reeeeally...

...in love with baby feet. :D

Fall bokeh: yes please! :D

 For making the first, last, and all the shots in between a blast...Thanks, cutie. :)

~Through Christ's Love ♥

P.S. Are y'all ready for my big long list of things I'm thankful {to God} for coming this Thursday?  Probably more ready than I am!! ;)

Friday Ramblings // northeast, tx lifestyle and portrait photographer

Hey there everybody! How are y'all? How's your week been? Good? 

That's wonderful; glad to hear it!

Anywho, just wanted to remind you that Thanksgiving is just around the corner. A week from yesterday to be exact. So now is the perfect time to start thinking about all the many things you are thankful for. 

There should be a gazillion. 

Believe me.

 

Even if you've been having a rough time lately. Everything that happens to us is an absolute blessing whether we realize it or not. God pours soooo much grace and mercy out on all of us daily...even if-- no scratch that, in spite of the fact that we don't deserve it. We don't deserve anything but Hell...anything above that is, you guessed it, a blessing! Wow...how often I forget that! For those who are children of God, the blessings will never end. Never...even into eternity. For those who are outside of God, the blessings will end when they do, and they will get what they truly deserve. For eternity. No more mercy. God could choose to take everything away from us at anytime and still be supremely just, so let us be grateful for all things as long as He sees fit to let us be stewards of them.

I'm thinking about making a list of 99 things I'm thankful for, just off the top of my head. That would be a good reminder for me...hmmm...now that I speak of it, if I follow through with such a plan would y'all like to see such a list? 

Well, too bad...I'm gonna post it on Thanksgiving anyways. ;)

By the way, I'm pretty sure that those Indians that exchanged warm-fuzzy-feel-good-friendly-thankful feelings with the Pilgrims at the very first Thanksgiving dinner didn't have blond hair and blue eyes. But I'm pretty sure that they weren't near as cute as these Indians. 

In fact...I'm daring enough to be positive that they couldn't have been even remotely as adorable as this.

Or this. 

Definitely not this.

 

For surely. 

Mmmmm...yummy light :)

Absotively Posolutely.Hunter-Gatherers. Mushrooms anyone?

Gotta keep them headdresses on...they tend to slip.

The real deal Injuns couldn't even have topped this...what do you call this? Vicious? 

Crazed? 

Determined. 

There we go. 

Now, all of you go watch Chocaponus...I mean, Pocahontas. Even if its not entirely historically accurate. Yeah, she wasn't really in love with John Smith in real life. Whoops...you might've added a little bit of Hollywood interpretation there, Disney. ;)

In other news, my dogs like to be photogenic sometimes. I see them sitting angelically beside one another. Actually angels are white shining sinless creatures with firey eyes so I'm pretty sure my dogs have never looked like. [crickets chirping] What was I saying? Oh yeah, sometimes I look outside and see my dogs sitting sweetly beside one another with faces that seem to literally scream "Photo Moment!" I run off...actually its probably more like a jog...alright, we'll settle for brisk walk, fair enough? I grab my camera and by the time I get back I see this. Well they're still close to each other.  But then...

Thanks Daisy. Thank you very much. 

She finds it hilarious. Go figure. 

Did you guys know that I had a pet chinchilla? Me neither.

 Maybe a fruit bat. Yep. Definitely more like a fruit bat.

 It's okay Layla, I feel your pain.

Well, I guess I'll see you all on Thanksgiving...maybe sooner...we'll see. :)

~Through Christ's Love ♥